So! Long time no update again. Much has changed. Go grab a cuppa and settled down for a long read. Its okay, I'll wait!
. . .
You good now? Excellent!
First off, got myself moved up to St.Albans (Hertfordshire, just North of London, for my American friends!) It's been in the pipe-line for a while now as a plan but it's finally happened and without too many vital injuries. Let’s face it: the life I had in West Sussex was just me eking out a life ... it wasn’t actually living. I went to work, I came home again, I had a bad diet for a vegetarian, I spent most of my time on the computer – escaping the shit, with the occasional visit to Cittaviveka, I didn’t socialise and to make matters worse, I still couldn’t help my family recover and be safe either! So, it pretty much sucked.
Getting up here on the train was bloomin' painful! I kid you not. Turns out there are works on the lines at the weekends. I've never travelled up on a weekend so I didn't know until I got to East Croydon ... where I promptly found out there were no trains going to St.Albans. Talk about panic! Considering it’s about nine-at-night! I thought I’d be bloody well stuck on the skirts of London!
The conductor told me I had to go to London and travel the Underground. Brilliant ... except I’m no good with absolutely crowded places. I need a day to mentally prepare to be ready for the London and the Underground. It’s a horrid place. I love the history and the buildings and the culture ... and everything, but that many people in one place – all of whom are ready to run you over because they didn’t see you. There’s something about that which turns my stomach upside-down! Doesn’t help that I’m not the most confident of gals either.
So, pulling my proverbial socks up, I jumped over to London Victoria from East Croydon. (I’ll openly admit now that I cried! The stress of moving, family strife, London, trains not running. It all got a little too much!) From there it was the Underground (which I totally had to take my HUGE suitcase up and down stairs and escalators and on the crowded trains ... and it was HEAVY) to Kings Cross St.Pancras. I missed the bloody connection there and had to wait a while but luckily I’d managed to bump into some nice folks who could see I was panicked and helped me a fair bit! Finally St.Pancras (which is an awesome station by the way! It has a mall in there and the Underground below and normal trains above ... and the Olympics logo is already hanging up there! Friend says there’s a Sushi bar in there somewhere!) to St.Albans. By the time I finally touched St.Albans soil it was nearly midnight.
But, moral of the story is: I made it and I’m still breathing! So maybe it wasn’t so bad.
Anyways! I’m now living in St.Albans with my aunty, uncle and little cousin – all of whom are totally awesome. I’m going to actually learn how to structure a proper vegetarian diet and broaden my cooking skills. I expect cousin will probably help with my writing too, considering he really wants to read “Bel-Gonows: The Child”!
Got a few pics for those never been here. St.Albans isn’t far from London and as such is a mega-affluent area. There’s jobs here, creative people, talent, country and city life, a market, loads of shops from cheap to expensive, trendy wine bars and proper country type pubs, and a Cathedral! It also has Amaravati (the other monastery) in the city next to it (Hemel Hempstead!) So, huzzah! Now, pictures:
. . .
You good now? Excellent!
First off, got myself moved up to St.Albans (Hertfordshire, just North of London, for my American friends!) It's been in the pipe-line for a while now as a plan but it's finally happened and without too many vital injuries. Let’s face it: the life I had in West Sussex was just me eking out a life ... it wasn’t actually living. I went to work, I came home again, I had a bad diet for a vegetarian, I spent most of my time on the computer – escaping the shit, with the occasional visit to Cittaviveka, I didn’t socialise and to make matters worse, I still couldn’t help my family recover and be safe either! So, it pretty much sucked.
Getting up here on the train was bloomin' painful! I kid you not. Turns out there are works on the lines at the weekends. I've never travelled up on a weekend so I didn't know until I got to East Croydon ... where I promptly found out there were no trains going to St.Albans. Talk about panic! Considering it’s about nine-at-night! I thought I’d be bloody well stuck on the skirts of London!
The conductor told me I had to go to London and travel the Underground. Brilliant ... except I’m no good with absolutely crowded places. I need a day to mentally prepare to be ready for the London and the Underground. It’s a horrid place. I love the history and the buildings and the culture ... and everything, but that many people in one place – all of whom are ready to run you over because they didn’t see you. There’s something about that which turns my stomach upside-down! Doesn’t help that I’m not the most confident of gals either.
So, pulling my proverbial socks up, I jumped over to London Victoria from East Croydon. (I’ll openly admit now that I cried! The stress of moving, family strife, London, trains not running. It all got a little too much!) From there it was the Underground (which I totally had to take my HUGE suitcase up and down stairs and escalators and on the crowded trains ... and it was HEAVY) to Kings Cross St.Pancras. I missed the bloody connection there and had to wait a while but luckily I’d managed to bump into some nice folks who could see I was panicked and helped me a fair bit! Finally St.Pancras (which is an awesome station by the way! It has a mall in there and the Underground below and normal trains above ... and the Olympics logo is already hanging up there! Friend says there’s a Sushi bar in there somewhere!) to St.Albans. By the time I finally touched St.Albans soil it was nearly midnight.
But, moral of the story is: I made it and I’m still breathing! So maybe it wasn’t so bad.
Anyways! I’m now living in St.Albans with my aunty, uncle and little cousin – all of whom are totally awesome. I’m going to actually learn how to structure a proper vegetarian diet and broaden my cooking skills. I expect cousin will probably help with my writing too, considering he really wants to read “Bel-Gonows: The Child”!
Got a few pics for those never been here. St.Albans isn’t far from London and as such is a mega-affluent area. There’s jobs here, creative people, talent, country and city life, a market, loads of shops from cheap to expensive, trendy wine bars and proper country type pubs, and a Cathedral! It also has Amaravati (the other monastery) in the city next to it (Hemel Hempstead!) So, huzzah! Now, pictures:
Neat little Church on the way into town! Over the road is the olden days youth hostel. I got a picture of that but it isn't worth sharing and you cannot read the historical plate >.>
I took Gran along for the exercise and to give Aunty a break. It was around here that I learnt about my Dad blowing up a hole in the pavement at their first house. He was always a crazy scientist. He'd just started science at school and totally emptied a bunch of fireworks into some sort of improv-bomb. Now I have something to use against him for when I nearly burnt down the garage! Heh.
I took Gran along for the exercise and to give Aunty a break. It was around here that I learnt about my Dad blowing up a hole in the pavement at their first house. He was always a crazy scientist. He'd just started science at school and totally emptied a bunch of fireworks into some sort of improv-bomb. Now I have something to use against him for when I nearly burnt down the garage! Heh.
Another amazing picture! Considering this is taken with a silly little phone-camera. I expect my religious friends (looking at you Jordoom) would appreciate this picture. I love how the sunlight is splashed across the top
... You'd think I was an artist at this rate! Lol!
... You'd think I was an artist at this rate! Lol!
The flower-beds outside of St.Albans police station. My Granddad probably worked in there! He was wicked awesome and totally hard! He's our connection to the real Albert Square Delaney lot. We Delaney's were the original Eastenders, baby! The flowers smelt gorgeous by the way. It's why I went back there to get another sniff >.>
For my history loving geeks (looking at you Agro!) Some dude was held in this pub ... Read the sign. They have some nice ales in here (which I cannot drink considering my tee-totalism!)
Opposite this is the bell-tower and the square of the original town centre. I would have gotten a photo for you but the bell is having work done and was covered in scaffolding!
St.Albans Cathedral! There are loads of these pictures ... Love the architecture!
Look at those castle type formations! I'd totally expect a blond-haired maiden to be in there, heh.
More groovy sunlight enhanced photo! Totally by accident this time.
I took Gran along with me. It was here that I learnt about her and her sister (my Godmother) having massive fights as children.
I took Gran along with me. It was here that I learnt about her and her sister (my Godmother) having massive fights as children.
Wishing I had a zoom on my phone-camera. This photo just doesn't do the stained glass justice! It is absolutely beautiful and especially when the sun hits it later during the day.
We think the dude on the slab below (the white statue) is Saint Alban.
We think the dude on the slab below (the white statue) is Saint Alban.
I actually thought Harry Potter when I saw this ... Such a dork! Heh.
That's all carving back there. This place is huge and within walking distance from where I now live. I can expect I'll be there a fair bit meditating. I'm not exactly a Christian but it is a great place to find silence ... and especially if I cannot get to a monastery.
(Going to miss Cittaviveka ... where my heart resides <3 )
(Going to miss Cittaviveka ... where my heart resides <3 )
The tower type thing. I'm not sure why there is one square missing ... but it's a long way up and totally fainted fresco up there.
Most people forget to look upwards at these types of places!
Another outside picture. The square piece above seen from the outside (with more artistic sunlight ... heh)
I love England! We gots some pretty amazing buildings.
I love England! We gots some pretty amazing buildings.
Where my Aunty works! This is an amazing art-deco building. Just beautiful. We didn't go inside this time because we had to get back for lunch-time!
Oh! And a little me! Looking dazzling, I might add. I'm normally in baggy jeans and a baggy tee. This is completely different for me but somewhere fun. Check it out, I've also lost some weight and look relatively healthy.
So, I finally left the card shop. Must admit that I was a little torn about leaving. I really enjoyed the struggles, the work, and the challenges. It was hard work but totally worth it. In the end, all those moves and the jokes with the customers and the friends I did make. It was a hard moment to actually walk away ... but in the end, I think it was also the right thing to do. I wasn’t enjoying it much at the end with the amount of stress present and with home-life being a disaster.
I’ll be able to help a lot more where I am now. I needed to feel needed and wanted – if that makes sense! I couldn’t help family I was staying with (and it didn’t feel right eating their food, which is why I brought most of my own and paid them rent!) I tried to help my family but that also fell apart. I was lost and wandering. Now I’m in St.Albans I’ll be able to have a proper job, with set hours (at the King Will pub waitressing or possibly behind the bar!) And more importantly, I’ll be able to look after Gran for a day or two, here and there, when it gets too much for poor Aunty. When Gran came down with dementia Dad moved in with her but it soon became too much for him and to keep that house running, so she got moved in with Aunt (Dad’s sister). Unfortunately that means Aunty hardly gets a break from the relentless dementia. It really is quite horrible and all of the time you need to watch out for her – so you never get to relax! I’ll be able to lighten the load while I am here and pay a small rent to Aunty instead of friends-of-family. Eventually I’ll move out but remain in the area (probably rent a place with a bunch of other people) and keep supporting aunty.
So, other news? Last night (too distraught from the move and kinda in need of company) I launched Skype for a good ole group chat with the writer friends. Managed to haul Merzin and Vriar into the chat (not really talk to them since moving back from America) ... which turned into a sudden Deadlands DnD session! Been such a long time since I’ve been able to play DnD. Completely random and unplanned but everybody was on-line at the time. Ended up with: King/Johnson, Vriar/Akana, Ian, Fluffy/Isak, Mezrin (who was the game-master) and me playing some funked up kind of western role-play. I rolled up (with the help of Mezrin, thank you!) a saloon girl (basically a whore) who is absolutely clueless. As we played I also discovered that she is very naive and doesn’t really know anything – and talks incessantly. Needless to say, there were many luls had! Especially with the slight underhand insults given by the men to my character that went over her head but not mine. Hopefully this group won’t collapse and will happen every weekend (apart from next weekend). Watch this space. We should find a way to record it ...
The Reclusian Times launch was majorly successful. On April 1st the magazine became live and the blog posts were set forth into the internet world. Got to say that it appears to have been a “great success” < said in the style of Borat. We had at least ninety people on day one and above ten every day after then. I’m not sure if this is the same people or if new people are finding the little website. Pretty exciting stuff though. Wishing the PDF could have looked a little more professional but I did kinda leave it a little late and that was my first time creating something like that. It definitely looked a lot like a book, which was awesome. So, now the action/assassin submission is closed and we are now looking for stories for the next issue! The next issue’s theme is: psychological. Already we have a few entries, so it should be pretty fantastic! (Kinda hoping Zovo gives us his Rorschach!) If you have a story that has some kind of psychological element to it (break-down, fears, inner-tyrants ... crazies!) then please do post it on the thread at AWR ... or send it was a Submission on the website itself.
Talking of publishing: Six Minute Magazine are gearing up to sort out their next edition. More exciting stuff. Hoping to hear back from them about the two stories I sent them. I gave them “Echo” – mostly as a tester for the waters and whether it was hot or cold (which they gave me back a rewrite request!) and “Bus-Route Rain” (which I still consider to be my best work). Not heard anything since the rewrite request but the magazine is run by a bunch of professional-friends and isn’t a hard and fast paced thing like everywhere else. For those of you who LOVE writing Flash fiction, you have about a week to get anything to them! They put a call out for submissions. Go and support a few friends of mine!
(Oh, and more publishing – even though I’m not seeking it urgently right now. The story I sent over to Brain Harvest “Invasion” got rejected. It was a form-rejection too. I expect it’s probably because it is a little ... different! It’s also got a last-line-reveal, which most electronic-magazines don’t really like. Once I’m settled in St.Albans I’ll start seeking publication again and continue with my writing since that has been on hold for a while!)
(Oh-oh! And Hugbugs ... the contract which was supposed to have arrived at the beginning of April. I’ve heard nothing from them. Going to send a letter later as to if I’m still accepted. If not, I’ll just send it somewhere else. No worries – although admittedly it would be nice to still be accepted considering it’s the first short-story I’ve sent out.)
Wonder if Taed has gotten any news about his publishing attempt? Allya of AWR got some of her poetry published this month – Congrats! I’m not sure when it will be available or through what kind of source. Watch this space. Hopefully she’ll be able to share it with us and then I will link it.
Bloodeye’s Dominance War has restarted (after a bunch of postpones). Everybody keep your fingers crossed for him. He’s stalling right now with the drawings – says it’s like he doesn’t “like” any of what he does. I think he might have gotten himself too worked up about it. Besides, at this point the picture doesn’t have to be perfect! Still, fingers crossed. The theme for the competition is to create a God. Here’s a link: new sketches (which I think are just too awesome!)
What else?
I visited Cittaviveka for the last time (for a while, at least!) I won’t be able to make any day trips there any more considering the distance. Now it’ll have to be reserved for retreats. I can now truly say that my heart resides there. I am at my most happiness when cross-legged in their Dhamma hall or hiking through Hammer Wood. One day, one day ... I’ll give up some of my life – maybe all of it – and take up the monastic life for a while. I’m probably as close as possible without actually being there right now anyway! I don’t eat meat, I don’t drink, I keep the precepts well, I meditate a lot, and I’m not interested in relationships or material things. I took sister with me this time because I wanted to show her my little peace-haven. She was so well behaved and did the hour meditation for the night service. We planted hedges – so I’ve kinda left a little print on Cittaviveka and Hammer Wood. Forty years from now those hedges will be mature. I hope to be there one day to see that ... maybe in my own brown robes.
From now on I’ll be attending to Amaravati – the other monastery. I have a friend up there helping out for the Summer retreat. It’ll be nice to touch base with her again, since we only ever get to text each other. The temple is also amazing! Hopefully I’ll be able to make a lot of the Dhamma talks and meditations – and unlike Cittaviveka they have special group to support the lay people with their meditation and retreats and questions: the ALBA (Amaravati Lay Buddhist Association). So hopefully I can get totally involved and help out there. Helping out are things that I really enjoy.
Random side-note: I really, really feel like making some bread or maybe cupcakes. I won’t today because I’m waiting for my aunty and uncle and cousin to get home. Possibly tomorrow though. On the upside this means my creativity is coming back for another upswing, so hopefully I’ll get some more writing done too!
Much love to my readers. I’ll update you again soon on how I am settling in. Going to the pub on Monday (tomorrow) to sort out paperwork and the likes and when my shifts will be. After that, it is anybodies guess. I don’t think Gran is coming back for another week (she stayed with her sister this last week!)
I’ll be able to help a lot more where I am now. I needed to feel needed and wanted – if that makes sense! I couldn’t help family I was staying with (and it didn’t feel right eating their food, which is why I brought most of my own and paid them rent!) I tried to help my family but that also fell apart. I was lost and wandering. Now I’m in St.Albans I’ll be able to have a proper job, with set hours (at the King Will pub waitressing or possibly behind the bar!) And more importantly, I’ll be able to look after Gran for a day or two, here and there, when it gets too much for poor Aunty. When Gran came down with dementia Dad moved in with her but it soon became too much for him and to keep that house running, so she got moved in with Aunt (Dad’s sister). Unfortunately that means Aunty hardly gets a break from the relentless dementia. It really is quite horrible and all of the time you need to watch out for her – so you never get to relax! I’ll be able to lighten the load while I am here and pay a small rent to Aunty instead of friends-of-family. Eventually I’ll move out but remain in the area (probably rent a place with a bunch of other people) and keep supporting aunty.
So, other news? Last night (too distraught from the move and kinda in need of company) I launched Skype for a good ole group chat with the writer friends. Managed to haul Merzin and Vriar into the chat (not really talk to them since moving back from America) ... which turned into a sudden Deadlands DnD session! Been such a long time since I’ve been able to play DnD. Completely random and unplanned but everybody was on-line at the time. Ended up with: King/Johnson, Vriar/Akana, Ian, Fluffy/Isak, Mezrin (who was the game-master) and me playing some funked up kind of western role-play. I rolled up (with the help of Mezrin, thank you!) a saloon girl (basically a whore) who is absolutely clueless. As we played I also discovered that she is very naive and doesn’t really know anything – and talks incessantly. Needless to say, there were many luls had! Especially with the slight underhand insults given by the men to my character that went over her head but not mine. Hopefully this group won’t collapse and will happen every weekend (apart from next weekend). Watch this space. We should find a way to record it ...
The Reclusian Times launch was majorly successful. On April 1st the magazine became live and the blog posts were set forth into the internet world. Got to say that it appears to have been a “great success” < said in the style of Borat. We had at least ninety people on day one and above ten every day after then. I’m not sure if this is the same people or if new people are finding the little website. Pretty exciting stuff though. Wishing the PDF could have looked a little more professional but I did kinda leave it a little late and that was my first time creating something like that. It definitely looked a lot like a book, which was awesome. So, now the action/assassin submission is closed and we are now looking for stories for the next issue! The next issue’s theme is: psychological. Already we have a few entries, so it should be pretty fantastic! (Kinda hoping Zovo gives us his Rorschach!) If you have a story that has some kind of psychological element to it (break-down, fears, inner-tyrants ... crazies!) then please do post it on the thread at AWR ... or send it was a Submission on the website itself.
Talking of publishing: Six Minute Magazine are gearing up to sort out their next edition. More exciting stuff. Hoping to hear back from them about the two stories I sent them. I gave them “Echo” – mostly as a tester for the waters and whether it was hot or cold (which they gave me back a rewrite request!) and “Bus-Route Rain” (which I still consider to be my best work). Not heard anything since the rewrite request but the magazine is run by a bunch of professional-friends and isn’t a hard and fast paced thing like everywhere else. For those of you who LOVE writing Flash fiction, you have about a week to get anything to them! They put a call out for submissions. Go and support a few friends of mine!
(Oh, and more publishing – even though I’m not seeking it urgently right now. The story I sent over to Brain Harvest “Invasion” got rejected. It was a form-rejection too. I expect it’s probably because it is a little ... different! It’s also got a last-line-reveal, which most electronic-magazines don’t really like. Once I’m settled in St.Albans I’ll start seeking publication again and continue with my writing since that has been on hold for a while!)
(Oh-oh! And Hugbugs ... the contract which was supposed to have arrived at the beginning of April. I’ve heard nothing from them. Going to send a letter later as to if I’m still accepted. If not, I’ll just send it somewhere else. No worries – although admittedly it would be nice to still be accepted considering it’s the first short-story I’ve sent out.)
Wonder if Taed has gotten any news about his publishing attempt? Allya of AWR got some of her poetry published this month – Congrats! I’m not sure when it will be available or through what kind of source. Watch this space. Hopefully she’ll be able to share it with us and then I will link it.
Bloodeye’s Dominance War has restarted (after a bunch of postpones). Everybody keep your fingers crossed for him. He’s stalling right now with the drawings – says it’s like he doesn’t “like” any of what he does. I think he might have gotten himself too worked up about it. Besides, at this point the picture doesn’t have to be perfect! Still, fingers crossed. The theme for the competition is to create a God. Here’s a link: new sketches (which I think are just too awesome!)
What else?
I visited Cittaviveka for the last time (for a while, at least!) I won’t be able to make any day trips there any more considering the distance. Now it’ll have to be reserved for retreats. I can now truly say that my heart resides there. I am at my most happiness when cross-legged in their Dhamma hall or hiking through Hammer Wood. One day, one day ... I’ll give up some of my life – maybe all of it – and take up the monastic life for a while. I’m probably as close as possible without actually being there right now anyway! I don’t eat meat, I don’t drink, I keep the precepts well, I meditate a lot, and I’m not interested in relationships or material things. I took sister with me this time because I wanted to show her my little peace-haven. She was so well behaved and did the hour meditation for the night service. We planted hedges – so I’ve kinda left a little print on Cittaviveka and Hammer Wood. Forty years from now those hedges will be mature. I hope to be there one day to see that ... maybe in my own brown robes.
From now on I’ll be attending to Amaravati – the other monastery. I have a friend up there helping out for the Summer retreat. It’ll be nice to touch base with her again, since we only ever get to text each other. The temple is also amazing! Hopefully I’ll be able to make a lot of the Dhamma talks and meditations – and unlike Cittaviveka they have special group to support the lay people with their meditation and retreats and questions: the ALBA (Amaravati Lay Buddhist Association). So hopefully I can get totally involved and help out there. Helping out are things that I really enjoy.
Random side-note: I really, really feel like making some bread or maybe cupcakes. I won’t today because I’m waiting for my aunty and uncle and cousin to get home. Possibly tomorrow though. On the upside this means my creativity is coming back for another upswing, so hopefully I’ll get some more writing done too!
Much love to my readers. I’ll update you again soon on how I am settling in. Going to the pub on Monday (tomorrow) to sort out paperwork and the likes and when my shifts will be. After that, it is anybodies guess. I don’t think Gran is coming back for another week (she stayed with her sister this last week!)
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